The Late Nighties are in full swing - have you voted for your favorite nominees yet? Here's the latest category up for your consideration: The Most Hilarious Thank You Note. Thank You Notes have become one of our most prized show traditions. Now it's time to honor some of the best.
Thank you, rappers who wear flat brimmed baseball hats, for making my Lego Men seem more "gangsta."
Thank you, So You Think You Can Dance, for having the least easy-to-say name of any show on television. And thanks for being needlessly accusatory, as though I'm going around bragging that I can dance. I never claimed that I could dance. What's your problem, anyway?
Thank you guy in revolving door who isn't pulling his weight, for letting me handle all the pushing responsibilities while you handle all the waiting responsibilities. No, let me get it for you. You're the king of the hotel entrance.
Thank you, the word "moist," for being the worst word ever. I think I speak for all Americans when I say that we don't want you as a word anymore. God I hate you.
Thank you, "celebrity couple nicknames," for not naming the new Jennifer Aniston/Gerard Butler relationship Anis-Butt.
Thank you, guy in his fifties who jogs in spandex lycra pants. The good news is, regular exercise at your age can greatly reduce your chances of heart attack, disease and stroke. The bad news is, I can see your nuts.
Thank you, Tom DeLay, for yet again pushing the limits of fashion during your farewell samba on "Dancing With the Stars." You're half-elf, half referee and ALL front-butt.
Thank you, October, for coming to an end. Like my mom always said, October comes in like a lion and goes out like a slutty nurse.
Thank you, the name Lloyd, for starting with two L's. I'm glad both those 'L's' were there because, otherwise, I would have called you 'Loyd'.
Thank you, cockroaches living under the sink in my bathroom. First, there were 2 of you, then there were 4, then 10, then 30. I don't know how you reproduce so quickly, but I can only come to one conclusion: you're a bunch of sluts.