You guys like Jersey Shore? You excited for Jersey Shore 2: Dream Warriors!? (I think that's the working title.) Jersey Shore Season 2 will soon be upon us (taking place in none other than...Miami?) and everyone knows that super tan juiced up bros and broettes are as American as fast food and oil spills (whoa, sorry bout that). So now that they're in the cultural fabric for at least a few more seasons, let's continue the embrace. Here's another way we can do that. Not too long ago a package showed up at the office pour moi. It was soft and pillowy and I knew it contained one of two things: a pillow or a t-shirt. It was the latter. But it was something more than a mere t-shirt. I opened the package up to reveal a veritable 100% cotton bro'd out super hero cape. Behold - the Gui J Hero T-Shirt.
The Gui J Hero shirt does a few things. It works on wordplay. Guidos + DJs + DJ Hero = Gui J Hero. It also pays tribute to our bros on the front lines of the Jersey Shore. You know who's silhouette that is on the shirt? Pauly-frickin'-D! That's who! But the shirt also empowers you. You put on this shirt and YOU are the new hero, the new guidio, the house party GUI J. A hero lies in you! Believe in your dreams!
So how does it work? Like a shirt (duh). Pretty standard. I tested it out for you. Observe. One minute I'm a mild mannered J. Crew shopper who just wants to get back to his NPR and window sill houseplants, but 10 seconds later....
Just. Like. That. INSTANT bottle service bros. I drank like a case of the Goose after I did that dance. And who approves of it?
So I think it's safe to say this shirt is a huge WIN bro. HUGE. I am now the Gui J Hero and you can be too! Yeah bro! OK, in all honesty, as much as this shirt got me pumped up, I have to say that I cannot hang in the Jersey Shore/guido/DJ scene very well. Recently I was in Atlantic City with some Late Night friends and we had the pleasure of hearing a famous Jersey Shore DJ spin. This is what happened (Warning: VERY loud music ahead):
Needless to say, without the Gui J Hero shirt, I'm just me. Regular old scared-of-flashing-lights-sirens-and-fist-pumps me.
